I’m starting to notice a shift in my 4 year old’s behavior and it’s really been on my mind. Whenever she gets frustrated or overwhelmed, her little fists ball up like she’s about to hit. She hasn’t hit anyone yet but I can tell it’s coming if we don’t address it soon. She’s always been a child with really big emotions, and this is the first time I’m seeing her express it in a way that feels a bit… aggressive.
It’s hard for me to know how to respond when I see those fists form. I don’t want to dismiss her feelings but I also want to help her manage them in healthier ways. Any advice or thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
Oh wow, that sounds so familiar! My son was arond the same age when he started doing the same thing. I used to feel that little jolt of panic every time I saw his hands clench. It’s like their emotions are bigger than their bodies can handle, you know?
1 Like
My daughter went through a similar phase and it didn’t last forever, I promise! What helped us was teaching her to change that behavior for a different one (my friend is a child psychologist and helped mme with this) so we suggested she could squeeze a pillow when she felt like hitting. We practiced it together so she knew what to do when those big feelings hit. Over time, it really helped her release the frustration without hurting anyone. Just keep being consistent and know that you’re doing a great job by noticing these things early.
My 7 year old went through this phase too, hang in there! One thing that worked wonders for us was teaching emotional regulation through play. We used a set of feelings cards to name what they were experiencing. Sometimes just saying, “Oh, you’re feeling really frustrated!” gave her the words she needed to express it instead of balling up her fists. I also introduced a calm down jar with glitter water. She would shake it and watch the glitter settle…it gave her time to cool off before reacting. Small tools like that made a big difference over time.