I’ve never seen him like this at home, and I don’t know how to handle this. I don’t want to be too harsh, but I also don’t want him to think this behavior is okay. When I acknowledged him, I noticed he was a little nervous, and when I asked him, he just said that other kids hit him too. I don’t know if it’s true or just an excuse, but I don’t want him to get used to solving things like this. I want to teach him discipline without hurting his self-esteem. How do I explain to him that this is not right without making him feel rejected?
Oh wow, I went through almost the same thing with my little one last year! It was such a shock because, like you, I’d never seen that kind of behavior at home. I kept wondering where it was coming from. Turns out, he was getting pushed around a bit at daycare and didn’t know how to express his frustration. We had a lot of talks about using words instead of hands, and I also worked with the daycare teachers to make sure he felt safe speaking up when something happened. You’re not alone in this, and I promise it gets better with time and patience
Oof, that’s so tough. It’s hard when you feel like you don’t recognize your own kid in a situation like this. You’re doing the right thing by questioning how to handle it. Just remember, they’re still so little and learning every day. This doesn’t mean he’s going to grow up to be aggressive, just that he needs some guidance. Hang in there!
It sounds like your little guy is still figuring out how to navigate social situations, which is totally normal at this age. The good news is that you’re catching it early! He’s still young enough that with your help, he can learn to express his feelings in a healthy way. Maybe some role-playing at home could help? You can act out different situations and practice responses with him so he feels more confident using words instead of hands. It’s not a lost cause at all, just part of the growing process
Wait, are we raising the same child? Because this is exactly what happened with mine a few months ago. I also got the whole “but other kids hit me too” response, and I had no idea what to believe. Did you talk to the daycare about what they’re seeing? Like, is he reacting to something, or is he the one starting it? I had to really push my daycare to get more details, and that helped a lot in figuring out how to address it at home
Been there, done that, twice. I have two older kids, and let me tell you, this is actually really common. At this age, they’re still figuring out boundaries and testing what they can and can’t get away with. What worked for me was a mix of clear but gentle discipline. Every time my kids acted out, I’d reinforce, “Hands are not for hitting,” and we’d practice taking deep breaths or using words instead. Also, making sure they had enough outlets for their energy helped, a lot of this can come from frustration or overstimulation. If your son sees hitting at daycare, he might be copying, so helping him learn other ways to respond is key
Something that really helped me when my son went through this was the “Stop, Breathe, Talk” method. Before reacting, I’d remind him to stop, take a deep breath, and then tell me what happened. It helped slow down the impulsive reactions. Also, books about emotions and social situations made a big difference! There are some great ones like Hands Are Not for Hitting and Teeth Are Not for Biting that make it fun but also reinforce the message. Maybe check if your daycare has a way to address conflict resolution too? Some places use a “peace corner” where kids can talk things out with guidance. This phase is tough, but with consistency, it’ll pass!