I don’t want him to feel like the phone is bad or that I’m punishing him by taking it away, but I also can’t handle this constant bargaining. I’m honestly at a loss for how to set better boundaries or get out of this cycle. Anyone else gone through this?
My 8yo is all about Roblox, and it feels like pulling teeth just to get them to set it down and do basic stuff. I totally feel you on the tantrums. It’s exhausting. I don’t have any magic answers, but just know you’re not alone.
I hear you, Charlott. My 7yo was like this too, it’s like they know exactly how to push us. For me, it started with “just five more minutes” and then snowballed. I realized it wasn’t just about the phone; it was becoming a control thing for him. What helped us was sitting down together (when things were calm) and making a “screen time deal” that we both agreed on. He still pushes back sometimes, but it feels less like a power struggle now. Sending hugs, it’s tough!
We went through a similar phase with our 9yo. What helped us was making the phone part of a rewards system rather than a negotiation tool. We made a chore chart where tasks had to be done before any screen time. It’s tough at first because they’ll resist, but stay consistent. Over time, they get that the phone isn’t a bargaining chip, it’s something they earn. Hope this helps!
Oh wow, this post hits home. My 7yo is obsessed with their tablet, and we had almost the exact same situation. I get so tired of hearing, “Only if I can play Minecraft!” It feels like they’re glued to the screen. I haven’t figured it out yet, either. Can I ask, do you have rules about when/where he can use the phone? Maybe that could help set some boundaries?
One strategy we’ve been using is a timer. Our rule is no screens until homework/chores are done, and we set a timer for screen time. Once the timer goes off, that’s it, no exceptions. It took a few tantrums at first, but now my 6yo knows that the timer is the boss, not me. It also helps to plan a fun activity after screen time so there’s something else to look forward to. You got this!
It sounds tough right now, but it’s great that you’re noticing this early. You’re laying the groundwork for healthy habits, and it will pay off. Once you set clear boundaries and stick to them, kids adapt quicker than we think. You’ve got this, mama!
my 6yo is all about their tablet too. One time, I said no to more screen time, and they locked themselves in their room “forever.” I had to bribe them out with ice cream. 
Not my best moment, but hey, we’re all learning, right?
I have two older kids, and trust me, this phase will pass if you stay firm. The key is consistency and not giving in to the negotiations. If they know they can bargain, they’ll keep doing it. I found that offering choices helped, like, “Do you want to pick up your toys first or help with laundry first?” This gives them a sense of control without letting the phone dictate the situation. Hang in there!
We struggled with this too, and what worked was creating a “no phone zones” rule, like no screens at the table, in bedrooms, or during family time. We also started having “tech-free hours” in the evening. It was rough at first (major meltdowns), but eventually, it became routine. It’s not perfect, but it’s made a big difference in how our family interacts. Maybe try starting small with something like that?
Thank you all for these suggestions and for just getting it. I think you’re right, it’s about consistency, but that’s been the hardest part for me. I’m going to try the chore chart and the timer idea, but I’m dreading the tantrums. It’s good to hear that it gets better because, right now, it feels never ending