I’m referring to the emotional transformations, the behavioral changes, and how to adapt to their new needs and challenges. Lately, I feel like I’m navigating uncharted territory. One moment he’s my sweet little boy, and the next he’s shutting me out, rolling his eyes, or questioning every decision I make. It’s like a rollercoaster of moods, and I’m not always sure how to respond without making things worse. Do you have any advice on how to make this transition smoother for him (and me)?
Oh Claudia, I’m right there with you! My son turned 12 recently, and it feels like every week brings a new “first”, first time he slammed a door, first time he refused a hug, first time he laughed at me for using outdated slang (apparently, “cool” is not cool anymore?). I’ve learned to pick my battles and give him some space when he’s moody. Also, having one-on-one time for something fun like a movie night or just chatting about his favorite video game has helped us reconnect. Hang in there, you’re doing great!
Hi Claudia! I’ve got three kids, and my oldest is 16 now, so I’ve definitely been through the early teen phase. First, let me say it’s totally normal for them to test boundaries. That’s part of figuring out who they are. What worked for me was focusing on communication, being available without being pushy. I’d ask open-ended questions like, “What do you think about [insert topic]?” to get them talking. Also, I’d let them know it’s okay to have big feelings but teach them how to handle those emotions responsibly (without yelling or shutting down). Therapy apps or journaling can be helpful too.
Ugh, same here. My kiddo is 11 too, and the eye, rolling is constant. I try not to take it personally, but omg, some days I feel like I can’t say anything right. No advice, just here to say you’re not alone in the struggle
Lol, Claudia, I once tried to give my 13-year-old daughter advice, and she said, “Thanks for the TED Talk, Mom.” Teens are wild. I’ve started calling this stage “the training wheels for adulthood.” They’re figuring out independence, but they’re still so wobbly. Sometimes, you just gotta laugh through it!
Omg, yes, I’m seeing this too with my 11 year old son. One day he wants to cuddle on the couch, and the next, he’s giving me the silent treatment because I suggested wearing a jacket. How do you deal with the constant whiplash? Do you have any go-to ways of staying patient when they’re being so stubborn?
Hey, Claudia! It gets better, I promise. My daughter is 15 now, and while those early preteen years were tough, she’s mellowed out a lot. It helped to remind myself that it’s a phase, they’re figuring out their emotions and testing independence. Keep showing up with love and support, even when they push you away. Eventually, they come back around, and it’s so rewarding to see them grow into themselves.
Thanks for all the replies, it’s really comforting to know I’m not alone. I like the idea of focusing on communication and giving him some space to figure things out. It’s hard to balance letting go and still being there when he needs me, but I’ll definitely try some of your suggestions, like asking open-ended questions or making time for fun together. The reminder that it’s all a phase is exactly what I needed to hear today. 