I really don’t know what to do with my son’s tantrums. We went to the mall because he needed to buy some things, and everything was going well until out of nowhere he started screaming and crying because he wanted a toy. I tried to calm him down with soft words, but nothing worked. People were looking at us, and I felt like crying. In the end, I had to pick him up and get out of there as best I could. I feel exhausted, ashamed, and with no idea how to handle this
I had almost the exact same experience last week at Target. My daughter saw a doll she wanted, and when I said no, she lost it. Full-on meltdown in the middle of the aisle. I tried staying calm, but inside I was panicking because people were staring, and I felt like the worst mom ever. Ended up carrying her out while she was still screaming. It’s the worst feeling, I totally get it. Just know you’re not alone, so many of us have been there
I hear you. Toddler tantrums in public are next level stress. It’s like your brain is going a million miles an hour, trying to calm them, avoid stares, and not lose your own patience. And then when it’s over, you’re just emotionally drained. It sucks. No advice, just solidarity
I feel you, Stephanie. I went down a deep rabbit hole trying to figure this out because my son used to do this all the time. What finally helped was giving him a game plan before we went anywhere. Before stepping into the store, I’d say, We’re getting X and Y, but no toys today. If we walk out without a tantrum, you get a sticker when we get home. The sticker thing worked for us because he loved collecting them. Another trick, giving choices. Instead of just saying no, I’d say, You can pick one small thing from the dollar section or we can go home and play with Play Doh. Giving them some control can sometimes prevent the total meltdown
Oh, I remember those days. My daughter is 7 now, but when she was 4, shopping trips were a nightmare. What helped was sticking to my no means no rule, even when it was hard. If I gave in once, she’d expect it every time. I also started making her part of the shopping trip, like helping me find the apples or putting things in the cart. It distracted her and made her feel like she was helping instead of just being told no. Hang in there! I promise it gets easier as they get older and understand more
One thing that’s worked for me is using the whisper trick. Instead of talking in a normal or loud voice when my son is freaking out, I whisper. He gets curious and has to quiet down to hear me. Also, setting expectations before we go in helps. I’ll tell him, We are here for groceries, not toys. If you stay calm, we can stop by the park later. It’s not perfect, but way fewer meltdowns now. Maybe worth a try?