He says he loves him so much, but he forgets to feed him, take him for walks, or clean his space. I end up doing everything, and it makes me exhausted and anxious. I wonder if I made a mistake by giving him this huge task or if he just needs more time to understand how important it is to take care of another living being. I feel like I’m failing to teach him something essential
Oh wow, I’ve been in a similar spot! My 10yo begged for a guinea pig, and we had the same struggle. It’s SO hard balancing teaching responsibility with not just taking over. You’re doing great just by trying to make it a learning experience, that’s what parenting is all about, right? Hang in there
I totally get how draining this is. Sometimes I think these big lessons are just so slow to sink in for kids. You’re not alone, this is tough
We’re kind of in the same boat with our 8yo and her fish. I’m curious, do you set reminders for him, or let him remember on his own? We’re still figuring out what’s best
You’re not failing at all! Kids take time to develop these skills. Sometimes it’s one small win, like feeding the puppy once without being asked, that starts the change. Keep going, you’ll get there
I’ve been through this with my now-teenagers! What helped us was creating a chore chart and tying it to small rewards. For example, if he feeds the puppy all week, he earns extra screen time. Also, breaking tasks down into specific steps can help. Instead of saying “take care of the dog,” you could say, “fill the water bowl before breakfast.” Smaller asks might feel more manageable for him
What worked for us was setting up a routine and making it visual. We put a checklist on the fridge: feed the puppy (morning), walk the puppy (afternoon), etc. My 9yo loved checking things off. Maybe he’d feel more motivated if it was a clear “win” every day?
We’re trying to teach our 7yo the same thing, but it’s hard when they’re forgetful. Do you think he’d respond better to consequences if he doesn’t follow through? I’m still not sure what’s fair at this age
When my daughter was 9, we went through the exact same thing. What finally worked was having a “talk” about what the puppy needs, with visuals. We even drew out a little schedule together. She still slipped up sometimes, but having her “buy in” really helped. Now she’s 13 and totally independent with her dog chores!
This is such a common challenge, Maria, and you’re definitely not failing. My 11yo begged for a puppy, and we had a similar struggle. What worked for us was framing the responsibility in a way that connected with something he valued. He’s super into being “big and grown-up,” so we talked about how being consistent with the puppy is part of “proving” that he’s ready for more freedom. We also set reminders on his tablet, it’s like a game for him now. I’ve had to let go of perfection, though, sometimes he forgets, and that’s okay. It’s all part of the process. You’ve got this!