As parents, we want the best for our kids, especially when it comes to what they eat. But sometimes, we find ourselves obsessing over every bite: counting calories, banning treats, and only allowing perfect meals. Our 8 year old started to feel stressed about food, and we noticed he wasn’t enjoying meals anymore. It made us wonder: are we putting too much pressure on ourselves and him? Finding a balance between healthy eating and letting kids be kids is hard, but maybe we need to relax and trust that balance will come naturally.
Same here. We’re all about “balanced eating” now, but it’s so tough.
It gets easier, I promise! Finding balance takes time, but you’ll get there.
We went through something similar with our 10year old. What helped us was introducing flexible food days. We still focused on healthy meals most of the time but would have Fridays as fun/flexible food days. It relieved a lot of pressure, and our kid learned that treats are okay in moderation. Now they’re more open to trying healthy options without feeling deprived. It’s all about creating a positive relationship with food, not a stressful one.
Lol, if my kid could he would trade his lunch salad for a donut at school every day, balance?
Wow, I could’ve written this post. My 7 year old started hiding snacks in his room because we were so strict about “clean eating”. It was a huge wake-up call for us. We sat down as a family and decided to change our approach. Now we involve him in meal planning, letting him pick a few favorite treats for the week. Honestly, it’s been life changing. He’s more relaxed, enjoys meals, and even surprises us by choosing healthy stuff on his own sometimes. I think kids learn better when they feel trusted rather than controlled. You’re not alone in this struggle!
Been there! My son is 13 now, and we’ve finally found a rhythm. When he was younger, we were super strict ie no sugar, no fats, organic everything. But he became obsessed with getting treats whenever he could. We loosened up and started teaching him about nutrition instead of dictating his choices. We explained how food fuels his body and why treats are fun but not the main course. Now, he’s good at self regulating.
As a mom of teens now, I can say this: obsessing over perfect nutrition can backfire. My oldest had food anxiety because we were so strict when she was younger. We eased up, started modeling balanced choices ourselves, and stopped making certain foods off limits. Over time, she developed her own healthy habits. Kids are smart and they pick up on our stress. What helped us was focusing on overall wellness, not just food so things like family walks, talking about feelings, and making mealtimes fun. It’s about the long game, not perfection at every meal.
I’ve read about something called the division of responsibility in feeding. It’s where parents decide what, when, and where meals happen, and kids decide how much to eat from what’s offered. It’s helped us relax a lot. Now our kid knows meals will include both familiar and new foods, and there’s less pressure at the table. It might be worth looking into!
I feel like I’m in the same boat but with no idea where to start. Do you let him pick what he wants sometimes? How do you make peace with the candy stash without feeling guilty? We’re drowning in conflicting advice, and I’m curious how others find a middle ground.
I’ve got teens now, and trust me: loosening up early is key. They figure it out.
Hang in there. You’re doing great!